This post is in response to Justine’s Story Prompt over at Eclectic Corner. It’s a cool place over there, with various fun challenges and games to get involved in, please check it out and join in. This time, Justine gave us a photo to use as a prompt for a story. I love this photo that she took – I originally thought to write about the dog being an evil monster at the bottom of the stairs, but when I started to write, this little snippet tumbled out. I am not a writer and this is probably my first real attempt since I was at school, so please forgive my writing!
As the big kid’s fist ploughed into his stomach, Tommy crumpled and fell back into the dirt. The kids laughed, sneering as they upended his schoolbag in a puddle before running off, leaving him with a sodden mess. It had been the same thing every day, they would follow him on his long walk home from school, taunting him all the way. “You’ve got no da-ad!”… “Your mum’s a looney!!” Tommy was conflicted, he was mad at himself for being mad at his parents. His dad had died in a car accident just a few months ago and his mama hadn’t coped well at first. He felt annoyed at his mama sometimes, but then felt so bad for feeling that way. He loved her really, but it was just the two of them, there was no one else to blame. Sometimes, when he was alone, he blamed his dad for leaving them, then he would cry at what a wicked child he was becoming. Poor Tommy, he was so sad, so alone…
He picked up his things and started walking home. His mum had seemed better these last few weeks. This morning she was especially bright and had asked him about his school work while she made a list for dinner. He hadn’t told her about his problems at school, even when she lightly scolded him for coming home in dirty and sometimes torn clothing. He didn’t want to give her anything else to worry about.
As he opened the rusting gate, he could hear music playing in the house, the windows were open with the curtains blowing in the breeze. It was still sunny and a little warm – he thought he might go down to the creek and have a swim. He trudged up the stairs…”Hi Mama, I’m home!”
“Downstairs love!” was her happy reply. He brightened, she sounded good. He could smell dinner cooking, roast chicken, yum! He dropped his bag, kicked off his shoes and tentatively opened the back door. His mama was in the garden waving to him. “Happy birthday darling boy”, she cried, pointing to the bottom of the stairs. Tommy looked down and saw a happy little white dog with black patches. The puppy was looking up at him, panting slightly, making him look like he was smiling at Tommy. For the first time in months, Tommy’s face cracked a smile and then a big grin. With tears of happiness in his eyes, he looked at his mama and then back to the dog and back to her. “He’s yours love” said his mama.
“You remembered!! Is he really mine!?! Thank you mama!” She laughed and nodded as Tommy ran down the stairs and the little dog bounded up to greet him. As he sank down on the step, giggling while the puppy licked the tears from his face, he didn’t see his mama take a deep breath and lean back to gaze up at the sky. She had sorted things out, her head had been clear for weeks now and as she drank in the sight of her son with his dog, she just knew that everything was finally going to be ok.
x desleyjane
What a great story you’ve created from this photo!!! You are a writer indeed!! I’m glad the story had a happy ending;)))
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Oh thanks again Lia! I was (am) quite nervous about it actually! EEK!
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Keep writing!!!! You captured emotion and suspense in your words:)
Look forward to more!
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Thank you! How is the blizzard?
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It wasn’t as bad here in NYC but Long Island and Boston got pummeled … So it’s back to work for me today! Thanks for the concern:)
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That’s good that you are ok, you must be thrilled going back to work 😉
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Lol indeed! On the train now…
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Your posts keep me company !
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Well then, same here 🙂 I’m watching telly but should be going to bed!
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Awe that is so lovely what a heart warming story, made my eyes burn with the threat of tears, happy tears that is. I had to laugh that you were originally going to write about an evil dog lol, I might have to ask for a second entry just to see what you were going to write I am intrigued hehe.
My eldest son has suffered bullying and Teddy and him are like brothers, i know that sounds weird, but well he waits for him after school just pads around until he gets home and then it’s just the two of them huddled up together very often, it’s so sweet and I know when my son hugs him he feels os much better, thank you fo rwriting this, it touched me xxx
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Thanks for your comments Justine, I’m so sorry your son has been bullied. Most of us have probably suffered from it at some point but it doesn’t stop it from being such an awful, sad, hopeless feeling. I’m so glad he has Teddy. I think it’s important to have a pet, and you know puppies are my favourite kind 😄
XOX
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Yes, Teddy is his life saver at times. I had a dog when i grewup so know how important it is for kids just to be around animals, it makes such a difference. His bullying goes in fits and starts and because of his Tourettes this is like a litmus paper showing us when he is having a bad time. We will muddle through 🙂 Thank you for your lovely words x
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Gidget is my lifesaver too. She’s always there, so happy to see me and often makes me giggle. Your poor boy, give him big hugs from me and missG x.
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I will ❤ Thank you x
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Keep writing! This has drawn me in so much more than quite a few books I have read!
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Oh thank you love! That’s so nice to hear. I’m trying to commit to writing something every plane trip since I’m usually just taking pictures of clouds LOL.
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A good short story with a happy ending, although, also leaves me wondering what will happen next…maybe a sequel…
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Aha you’ve spotted my problem Andy. I always get stuck on how to continue!!
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This was a beautiful story I like that there is a sense of resolution in the end, that things were going to be better for both Tommy and his mum.
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Thank you 😊
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I am waiting for the sequel 😀 or may be you could try at prequel 😉 You are good 🙂
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Hmmmmnnnn……
Thanks Andy!
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What do you mean, you’re not a writer? Very well done and it evoked emotions from me, as well! Now you need another chapter 🙂
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Aw thanks Terri, much appreciated.
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The words just flow out don’t they! Great post.
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Thank you, yes they did this time!
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Don’t you love it when a plan comes together…
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This looked on the surface at first like a sentimental little story, but it’s quite the opposite: you do take reality into account and don’t overdo it with happy moments. A great result!
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Thanks Mara. I remember writing so many stories as a child and constant feedback from teachers was that everything was too happy and not “real-life”. I took that to heart!
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A great write … really nicely written, I enjoyed it very much.
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Oh thank you so much! I enjoyed writing it and want to try some more ☺️
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And I’m sure with success! 🙂
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